I'm a 'fraidy pup

People's I've been in hiding. That's why you haven't seen me around for a while. Feared for my life. And I'm not like the cat...I don't have spare ones!

You'll be wondering what scareded me now, right? Well, as mummy said, 'tis a long and strange tale. Think she was being sarcst...sarcat....starcast...funny, but I'm never sure with her.

So here it is................(putting on story teller hat and crossing my paws)

Once upon a time, one day this summer ago, the 'Uman took me and Jazz for late 'blutions (last walk before bed) on Barrow common. 

'Twas a lovely warm night, 

with no peoples in sight, 

and a ball that was yellow and black. 

The ball flew thru the air,

Parting my hair,

While I chased it and then brought it back.

Out of the corner of my eye,

Movement did I spy,

And curiously I started the chase.

Moving shadow, I thought,

Or a new ball had been brought,

My friends, this wasn't the case.

It was huge, it had horns,

Jumped so high, hid in thorns,

'Til it stopped, looked me right in the eye.

Lowered it's head, pawed the ground,

I saw it pounce, turned around,

I thought this was my final goodbye.

But Merlin be nimble, and Merlin be quick,

And Merlin ran past a really good stick,

Never daring to look back at the monster.

Jazz watched from the grass,

The 'Uman stood at the pass,

From them both I could hear all this laughter.

It's Bambi, she shouted.

Just a deer, she called,

It won't hurt you, you silly old dog.

I felt rather foolish,

But it look scary, and ghoulish,

With that aura of mystical fog.

I feel more than a little bit anxious,

When we drive by I get a little bit nervous,

I'm really just a 'fraidy pup.

But now you know why,

I can't look you in the eye,

If eve you ask me 'what's up?'

A'venturising with Mummy and the 'Uman

People's I've been on 'oliday. I tooks Mummy and the 'Uman to a place called York Shire Dales. It's pritty--like me--and got lumpy bits--like Jazz. It fits us.

We stayed in the collapsible house again that Mummy calls a tent, but it was a bigger one this time, and Mummy 'sembled it straight from the car. She didn't have to lug it up a blumin mountain again and let the 'Uman get frost bites--not like last time.

The house lived right next to a river, which was really, really cool, peoples. It meant that I could go and cool off from the hotness whenever I felt like it. Just climbed down the bank and went for a swim, or a paddle if I only wanted to cool off my tootsies. Mummy even dividesed a fridge in the river...sort of. She put the 'Uman's beers, some other drinks, butter and stuff in her dry bag and sealeded it up. The she tied a rope around it, tied it to a tree and dangled the bag in the river, where the water was chilly. The 'Uman called her Bear Gryhls then...I don't understand, but I wasn't going to tell the 'Uman that! 'Specially when it turned out that the 'Uman hadn't packed the right gas for the new campy cooker she had brought. Mummy had to cook right over the fire instead. Sometimes, peoples, I has to shake my head at the 'Uman.

We did a new a'venture fing this time called Gorge Walking. Now, I don't know exactly it's called this but I fink it's  because all Mummy and the 'Uman kept saying while they was walking and swimming down the river was 'Oh it's gorgeous'. So maybe it's short for Gorgeous Walking...don't know.

So the Gorgeous Walking meant we could go climbing up and down the rocks with the water falling off them.

See? Gorgeous.

On the first day, Mummy and the 'Uman came in the water in swimming cozzies. The 'Uman said that she was getting frost bites again on different places to last time and the next day they wored wetsuits for the Gorgeous Walking. Wusses. I just went in in my fur.


Mummy tooked lots--and I do mean lots--of pictures with her camera. Some are really nice, and then she took some that aren't...erm...quite so nice.

 

This is the 'Uman from underwater. Mummy was being...erm...creative.

 

So back to me. I proved my swimming championshipness by racing the 'Uman for the stick in the water. I even gaved her a head start as I am 'ceptional. I call this video 'Uman versus Merlin de First, Queen of all her lands and must be obeyed. But I gives you all permission to watch it.

 

 

I think, peoples, I have found my Olympic sport.

 

There are more photopictures of my a'venturing on my facebook page. Mummy posted them before I could get to the laptop.

 

Bye for now, peoples, more to follow. Thank you please. Merlin de First, over and out.



Training for the weekend demo'strations!

Peoples, we're nearly ready for ya! Well, I am. Not sure abouts Effy...she hasn't been to skool to learn about jumps, and weaves and tunnels and fings. So me and Jazz have been showing her some stuff.

Can't have her letting the team down for the dog show and agility demo'strations on Sunday at my campsite...well Jazz says its her campsite. But we knows better don't we, Peoples!

Mummy says I have to plug the outdoor festival this week so that you all come to see me...I mean everything that's going on this weekend. So go here for more info'mation not about me, http://goo.gl/cGIhH

But I'll be there all weekend!

It's lost de plot...

People's one of the pants cats was sick on Mummy's bed. She refuseded to sleeps in it 'cos it stunked. She said she could smell it even through lesbian-flu...must be bad. Yes proples, that is scarc...sarc...scasm...me being funny! Anyways, on wiv my story.

So the 'Uman 'cided to change bedding. See picture below.

It took some time. This is Merlin de first...shaking head in 'sgust.

Recovery from mountain conkerin.

There is many ways that you people's seems to recover from this mountain conkerin stuff. Some of you sleeps it off...

Some of you eats foods...

Some of you vows never agains, feets hurt too much....

 

 

And some of yous drinks.

A lot.

I have been trying out your recovery methods but I fink I prefers my own.

I calls it...again!

Hunting for the Force!

The book said it is the longest vertical drop waterfall in Engerland. I hads to find it people's. it was imper...periti...impertita...very 'portant! It's called Scales Force, and it's just off Crummock Water. So off we sets for the waterfall.

The path was...erm...pants. Even I couldn't find it all the time and I walked through the river at some points. Mummy rock hopped up the river and the 'Uman...kinda walked/stumbled through the mud.

When we finally got there it was mostly frozen. But Mummy said it was pretty. Didn't look all that big to me.